Rivers and Roads and Missing One Another


I’m observing my three children care for each other. Sometimes when one is sick or away, I will see them miss the other’s company. They will wander around the house, from room to room, aimlessly like they lost their minds, or their best friend. Maybe that’s one strong and predictable way to care for those we love.

Miss each other.

Missing someone is simply forgetting where you put that connection between each other. Sometimes we miss those that have died, other times we miss those that are still here with us but out of our everyday lives. Regardless of where those you love are, here are some ways you can find that connection once again.

Make a short list of what you miss about this person. Don’t ask why, don’t live here forever. But get the thoughts out of your head and let yourself express yourself concisely. 

Visit a mutual friend. I’m surprised how quickly I can relive a good memory of one friend through another and share connections we had.

What activity always made you feel close to them? If it always worked once, it will work again.

Listen to music. The more nostalgic the better, I have found I can feel close to someone if we shared a memory over a song or artist.

What did you used to do together? Get back into the groove, even for only a little time.

Create. What cannot be said with words will be murmured underneath the soft breath of the brush, the gentle touch of the strings, the hushed whisper of the garden soil being folded over and over until you sense the closeness of what once was and is now with you hand in hand.

Photo albums encompass so many stories and allow us to preserve feelings and connections to the past. And that’s usually where all the friends still live. Keep those mementos close at hand for quick retrieval.

May those you miss today be found

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